Say Cheese

Okay boys, line up over there and smile.  This one's for your grandmother.

*sigh*

- 22 August 2013

Sometimes

"Sometimes my penis sticks out of my shorts and I don't like it," Logan informed his grandmother.

"Well, just stick it back in," she advised.

Wow.  Remind me not to sit next to the two of you at the dinner table.

- 28 July 2013

Just Eat

"This smells disgusting," Logan proclaimed.

"What does?" I asked.

"My fork."

First of all, I don't want to know what you've done or where you've put that fork to make it smell disgusting.  Secondly, just eat already!

- 16 June 2012

New Flavor

In the truck on the way to 7-Eleven, I was reciting, aloud, the list of various family members and Slurpee flavors.  The order was thus:

Ashley wanted Pepsi.  I wanted grape.  Logan, well, who knows what he wanted, we'd have to wait and see what was available.  Justin, ah, Justin.  He had disappeared with some friends so...one less Slurpee to keep track of.

I turned to Ethan and said, "What flavor are you going to have?"

"Donkey spittle," he replied, with a finality that indicated there weren't two ways about it.  

He continued to stare out the front window as we drove along, leaving no indication on his face as to whether or not he was serious.  I couldn't tell if he had given this a great deal of thought or if he knew what a thought was at this point.  Definitely my genes.

Donkey spittle?  He may or may not have been serious but I'm suddenly less excited about my Slurpee.

- 1 September 2013

Are You Feeling It Now?

"Justin, are you going to Scouts," Ashley asked, expecting the answer, "Yes."

"I'm just not feelin' it," he said, yawning and stretching.

Oh yeah?  Well, come over here where I can reach you and you'll be feelin' it!

- 4 June 2013

The Minion

Happy 5th birthday to my littlest minion.  Having had two other sons turn five before him, one would think that I would have remembered how the Terrible Twos don't stop just because they're not two anymore.  Their power over good and evil increases exponentially every 365 days.

Pardon my gaffe, I didn't mean to say good.

- 28 August 2013

Wipe Out

Having just hung up the telephone with my boss, I turned to consult my wipe board on the next step of my project.

"Logan!" I exclaimed.  "What have you done?  I have absolutely no idea what was on that board."

Hello!  I wrote it all on the board so that I wouldn't have to remember it.

Logan sheepishly replaced the caps on the markers.  He held my hand as we walked out of the office.

"It was just letters..." he said, trying to be helpful.  "And numbers," he added.

- 3 September 2013