Empty Cages

When one asks, “Logan, where are your guinea pigs*?” one does not expect the answer, “Oh, gosh!  Oh, no!!” as he topples his chair and sprints from the room. 

Indeed, one does not generally expect to be asking that question in the first place.  The answer is supposed to be obvious.

*Leaving them unattended outside their cage is a good way to fatten up the cat. 

- 25 March 2018

Even Cougars Can Like Purple

Any true Cougar will understand the gravity of this story. 

We are Cougars.  Washington State University Cougars.  We are all about the crimson and gray.  There simply aren't two ways about it.



This year, Christmas crackers were a part of our Christmas Eve dinner - a fun new tradition.  No, I’m actually serious.  Every package contained a prize, some jokes and a colorful paper crown.  Each family member eagerly donned their crown and a discussion began about favorite colors.

Ethan had received a purple crown.  It saddened us, inwardly, that this was currently his favorite color for it is also the color of the University of Washington Huskies, our bitter rivals.  As the conversation continued, the subject changed to what other things are purple.  Grandma suggested "Huskies" in hopes of getting him to change his mind about purple altogether.

"Good point, but still," he said, considering this fact.

"Maybe some day he will go to that school," Matt said, egging him on.

"Grandpa!  Stop swearing at the dinner table!" Ethan shouted.

That a boy!

- 24 December 2011

Dear YMCA

Oh, Y. 

     How close we’ve become. 

You know me because of my three indefatigable boys. 

     You see me through umpteen activities,

          Untold hours of watching and waiting,

               Countless pep talks and endless encouragement. 

Keeper of pools and rock climbing walls. 

     Teacher of swimming lessons and printing in 3D. 

          Basketball, volleyball, racquet ball and karate.

     Ping pong, pool, foosball and air hockey. 

          Chess, Legos, Play Station and Wii. 

Your choices are endless and so is your din. 

     You and I can never share a quiet moment. 

Do you ever miss me?

     Of course not, I’m here every day. 

I tried to exercise once but it was no use. 

     They always find you. 

- 7 March 2018

Dear Tooth Fairy

Dear Tooth Fairy,

I accidentally knocked [out] my little brother’s loose tooth and we think he swallowed it.  I hope you can use your magic to get it.  I’m very sorry. 

Love,

Ethan 

- 6 December 2014