Hula Haunting [Video]

"The kitty is a shaking animal, like a hula girl."

Please.  If the cat got even half that much exercise he'd be skinny enough to clean his own...anyway.  I think the reason he is shaking is due to the fact that a giant 3-year-old just lay down on top of him to provide hugs and kisses.

"He is?" I inquired.

"Ya."

There was a brief hula dance demonstration.

"Kitty, don't go outside," he warned.  "The back yard is haunted and the front yard is haunted."

I never did find out how one related to the other but I think I'm beginning to understand why no yard work is getting done.

-30 June 2012

Good Talk

"Dad?

     Can I...?

          Can I...?

               Hmm...now what was I gonna' talk to you about?"

He tilted his head to one side and lightly tapped his chin with his fingers.  It's no wonder I never get anything done around the house.  This is how a majority of our time is taken up.  I never did find out what he wanted to talk about.  I did, however, find out what he had eaten for breakfast, now that I was covered in banana bread muffin bits.  Dude, chew and swallow!

- 1 July 2012

Quit Messin'

"Logan, wash your hands and quit messing with the toilet!" Ashley hollered.

An insane giggle rang out from the bathroom.

"Why don't you quit messing with the magazine?" he retorted. 

Impudence!  Effrontery!

Ashley's mouth dropped open as she sprang up from the couch where she had, in fact, been reading.  She stood, framed in the doorway of the kitchen so that only I could see her, silently mouthing words of disbelief and stifling laughter.  I won't tell you what she did next because it was very unladylike, but man is she good with ASL.

- 30 June 2012

Rain Dance [Video]

There was a clap of thunder.  Logan ran up to the porch and stood there nervously eyeing the sky and looking worried.

"I hate thunder and lightning," he said.

"Don't look at me," I replied.  "You're the one that did the rain dance."

- 30 June 2012

Rain Gauge

"I'm gonna measure the rain."

After a long, serious examination of the measuring tape, the numbers were in.

"It's a lot of numbers."

- 30 June 2012

Not Too Quiet

"It's too quiet," Ethan announced to the table during lunch.

Justin nodded in agreement.  Both boys turned to look at me.  Whether they were expecting me to protest or agree I did not know.  What I did know is that this, like every other meal time, was nothing close to quiet.  Peaceful, yes.  Quiet, no.  There is only one other time I can think of when the house was "too quiet"...no, wait...that was a dream I had once - never mind.

"Chew, chew, chew," came Justin's voice from across the table.

"Slurp, swallow, slurp, swallow," echoed Ethan.

"Bite, chew, chew, swallow," Justin continued.

"Laugh, burp, laugh again," Ethan snorted.

Oh, terrific.  As if I didn't already have to sit here listening to all of this without the commentary, now I'm stuck in the middle of this twisted play-by-play.  To my dismay (but not my surprise), Logan picked up on the new game and quickly joined in.  His was less about what was actually occurring and more about the things he enjoyed.

"Chew, fart, explode," he giggled.

I was nearly finished with my own meal and it was time to make a decision.

"Slap, slap, cuff," I shouted, taking mock swings at both boys.

As I stood up to leave, the raucous laughter reverberated off the dining room walls. 

"Breathe, breathe, breathe," I muttered as I left.

Dorks, dorks, dorks.

- 1 July 2012

Laying it on Thick

"Can you help me with these train tracks?" Logan asked as he carefully made a path across the kitchen floor.  "'Cause dads of little boys don't let their little boys build them by their selves."

If it wasn't on his face, there was certainly a little pleading in his voice.  How could I resist?

- 30 June 2012