How Are They Gonna Know?

As a kid growing up in Spokane, Washington, I knew everything there was to know about the sewer system and waste water treatment plant.  You see, in order for us to get to Riverside State Park, a popular destination in my family, we had to drive right past it and, naturally, we wanted to know every detail.  My father was only too happy to oblige.  I never imagined that there would be anything peculiar about having this particular knowledge set, however, thinking back on it now, it seems slightly odd.  Perhaps it is because I'm a boy and this kind of twisted curiosity is inherent in all boys.  Perhaps not.  All I can say is that I knew what happened when you flushed and I knew what that smell was.

Growing up in Walla Walla is a little different.  Passing the waste water treatment plant isn't something most people do by accident.  As with any child, the questions they ask during potty training cover most of the important points of this subject.  "Where does it go?  How does it get there?  What happens to it after that?"  To most children of a potty training age, however, the concept of the world beyond their own home is abstract enough without throwing in the invisible-mystical-underground-poop-conveyance-system.

What they know for sure is this.  I flush.  It leaves.  I don't have to pack it around the house anymore and Mom and Dad don't have to change it.

So, when Justin's scout leader brought up the subject of a field trip to the sewage treatment plant, I couldn't wait to get home and tell him.  Sure enough, he was so excited he nearly peed.  Thank goodness for the potty training.

"Good!  I'll need to go to the bathroom right before we leave."

It did not occur to me that there was anything unusual about that statement.

"Always a good plan," I agreed. 

Typical one-track-mind Dad response...nobody pees in the car, go before we leave...finally, one of my children was paying attention!

"I want to find out how they label it," he said.

??

"Label what?"
"Well, how are they gonna know which one is mine?"
"Which one what?  Ohhhh!"

- 3 May 2009